Let’s talk about that other 4 letter S word….SELL!

People hear the word ‘SELL’ and they think sleazy, skeevy, used cars, cheesy smile, slicked backed hair…’Boy, have I got a deal for you!’… and now I need to go take a shower.

We get so conditioned to not ever want to be ‘ that guy’ (or gal) or ‘sell anyone something that we shy away from it in our own businesses.

Some of you know me in the business and lifestyle coaching capacity, others of you don’t know me at all.  Either way, most clients don’t realize that I have an entire sales platform of my business where I teach people how to sell authentically and in a very client-centered way and that I build, manage, and serve on sales teams in the corporate setting (by word of mouth only).  My point in telling you this is, I understand the stigma as I have been on all sides of the sales experience.

I recall a time when my mom asked me what I did for a corporate client once and I told her, I was in sales and was building a team to do outbound calling to their leads for an international coaching company and she said, “Oh Gaaawd, I hang up on you people all the time.”  YUP….’you people’.  No one wants to be ‘those’ people.  We have all had that experience right!?, where you hung up on the telesales person?

Why?  because it sucks when people try to sell you something that you don’t want or think you need…or have ever even heard of and do it in a pushy, won’t take no for an answer, you can’t get off your own phone kind of way.

However, People LOVE to be sold to when they are getting something they want and its done in a way where it elevates them and helps them reach the goal.  We become ‘those people’ when we are solely objective focused, numbers based, and monetarily driven without regard for the journey we are taking people on.  People don’t want to be taken for a ‘ride’.

I like to leverage the Platinum Rule vs Golden Rule here.  We are all familiar with the Golden Rule right?  “Treat others the way you want to be treated.”  Well, if you are afraid of sales and you hate to be sold to or like its some sort of violation, and you don’t know what it feels like to experience it as a collaborative, done for and with you not TO you process, ….you won’t do it, in any capacity.

Let’s talk about the Platinum Rule:  “Treat others the way they want to be treated”

Get out of your own way and give them what THEY want, how they want it.  They want to be heard. They want to be understood, and they WANT to be served! They even want to be sold to if they can see and feel the value.  They want permission to say yes to themselves from an outside source, and they will take that permission to heart if it feels like you are in it with and for them…not for you.  Much like you, HOW they want that may differ.  Put yourself in the shoes of the potential client/customer.  This is true for everything from widgets to high end services. Seek first to understand… #platinumrule.  Treat them how they want to be treated.  Support them based on how they are wired and make them feel supported and you have a ‘lifer’.  This is how ‘Ride or Die’ fans are born.   Really listen for what is not being said, build a relationship…not just seeing the end result of winning a contract.

People break contracts, but they don’t break relationships.

Make sure when you are ‘selling’ the receiver is receiving not resisting.  Are they being served?  Do we truly have their best interests at heart?  Can we say with integrity that we have enough trust that the people who are meant to work with us will and that coercive tactics simply for the sake of numbers have no place in our code of conduct?

I can often be heard telling my sales clients, “There are people who can get you higher numbers and higher conversions. If the numbers are your singular focus and highest priority and what is most important to you, I am not your gal.”  With that exclusive priority comes higher attrition, increased payment chasing, and more customer complaints because we sacrificed ‘right fit’ clients for the sake of the numbers….for the sake of ‘THE SALE’.   Let’s also not discount you have a higher percentage of people it sucks to serve (see the last blog post about PITAs).  In the end you don’t win and just as importantly neither do they.  I like to play the ‘long game’  I build relationships not contracts, this translates to higher retentions, greater client experience, and satisfaction leading to better client results, more referrals, and a bigger joy to serve because we have less PITA’s ( yup…you really gotta read that last post on the soapbox)…OH and more money!  YEEEESSS! I still care about you making more money!  You don’t have to ride the numbers so hard with this approach because you have less ‘churn’ to compensate for.  A fringe bonus: you build a tribe of amazing people who are like-minded and collaborative not competitive.  They make the world a happier place and love to pay you what you are worth.

It can take a big mindset shift to be successful at sales, it requires confidence in your process and in the experience you create for those you want to serve and for yourself.  You have to treat it like a collaborative experience.  It is, in fact, the prelude to the dance you will do when you work together.  Show them now who you are and how they will be treated.  That depth of authenticity and heart do not go unnoticed.

Brian Tracy said, “The definition of a sale is a transfer of enthusiasm.”

This concept is independent of the skill sets so many organizations and leaders spend time and money to train on. How do you show up to the conversion conversation? It matters!  Be a passionate leader, take a fierce and loving stand for their possibility.  Don’t fall prey to the fear of sounding ‘salesey’, or being pushy and then let go of their hand when the objections start to fly. It’s when they need you most. Lovingly stay with them, lead them through the dark and help them get through their fears. You can only show up as your best self if you feel great about the process and don’t associate any part of the experience with something that requires slick hair and a creepy smile with a cheesy hand gesture.

You have to master the sale to be successful in business.  Livelihood and sustainability depend on conversion conversations. What parts of this process do you love and hate?  Do you have a process? Where are your biggest stumbling blocks?

Would you like to come to an ‘’ask me anything about sales’ open office hours style call?  Let me know in the comments and I will let you know when the next one is being hosted.

Without the sale, you don’t get clients/customers.

Need a script that feels authentic to your voice and allows you to stand in your truth with confidence?  Grab a spot on the calendar here and let’s see how I can help you define your sales process if you don’t currently have one, or refine what you do have so you get more conversions.

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